I love...

I was looking for an email I had drafted and ran across this one. Declan was 3 years old. Now that I have an almost 3 year old in the house it was so fun to read through his behaviors at that age. A little moment down memory lane....

There are so many things I love about Declan at this age:

-His razor sharp memory.

-How when you come at him to wipe his hands or something he doesn't want he says "Swiper no swiping" with his hand out.

-How when I leave to go to work he exclaims "HUGS" and runs to give me the best hug ever.

-I don't love this, but it's for memory sake: his finger is always up his nose. 

-How he loves to do the dishes. And by doing the dishes I mean that he stands on a stool playing with the water, soap and dishes for at least a half hour. It's how I get time to clean these days.

-How smart he is and how much he learns every day. Recently I'm amazed at his ability to play games on my iphone. I was enjoying a leisure shopping trip at Children's Place last week and he BEAT all levels of the memory matching game. His favorite game right now is Icee (yes, as in the Icees you get at 7/11. You can pick out your cup, lid and straw, fill it with a flavor of your choice, drink it and even spray down the machine. A client of mine told me her 3 y/o loved it, otherwise I would have never got it).  

-I love the snuggles at bed time. He wraps his arms around me neck and we are nose to nose and he just breathes his sweet little hot breath all over my face. Heart melter.

-I love his prayers. He rattles off what he is thankful for 5 minutes. He loves praying for Julio and Sante (our two World Vision supported boys). He talks like they are part of our family: "Thank you for Papa & Nana, Uncle Shaun, Sante, Lukie...." 

-I love his spontaneous bursts in to song. Once he catches you looking at him he acts all shy and quiets down.

-I love how he asks where Mark is every day. When I tell him he's at work, he always says: "oh, he's busy". Every day. Several times a day. Then we usually call him to say hi. 

-This is sort of scary but worth remembering: he turns everything in to a stool (hamper, play bins, etc). Everything high up is fair game so it's made us be on our toes about putting things out of reach. Just last week he got the Oxyclean spray gel stuff of the top of the washer (we have front loaders on stands so it's a feat) and sprayed all surfaces including the walls in our laundry room with a coat of the nasty gel. Such fun to clean up. Not. 

-Not sure I love this but it's for memory sake: he runs to the car, opens the door, plops in to his seat and then insist on buckling himself in. We usually have a mini battle and then I secure him properly. Fiercely independent!

-I love how he holds my phone to his ear and says "Bancwise, this Ashley" (that is where I work and since it's real estate he hears me answering the phone during the day)

-I love inquisitive mind. There is too much I could fill in here so I'll leave it at that.

-I can't wrap this memory post up without mentioning he is so particular about everything: the cup we use, the way I put his food on the place, the seat he sits in, the shoes he wears, etc etc.

Viva Las Vegas

We LOVE going to Vegas. It's the perfect getaway. This year we were there on our anniversary which was special. The other exciting thing was that I won this trip though my job. Work hard=play hard. :)

After we landed we decided to skip the huge bus and get a town car. A little luxury to kick things off.

We checked in and immediately went down the pool. The classic desert heat screamed for a cold drink. We downed those and fell asleep for an hour. Happy place. A little chair imprint never hurt ya!

That night we were going to Zarkana and didn't have dinner plans so found this cute little restaurant near the show. It ended up being super fancy. We joked that we had never seen so many glasses and utensils. This drink was extra memorable. Tea ice cubes? Brill.

Circ du Soleil never, ever lets us down. Zarkana was incredible!

Day two we hit the gym and then the pool. Amazing how quick the hours tick by with the dry heat. We are used to chasing after 3 little boys but were able to nap, read and chat. 

After a nap we headed out to meet our friends for dinner and another show.

When my friend Lisa fun out we were staying at Aria, she said we just HAD to try Javier's. She was right! It was delish. Still dreaming about my cucumber marg. 

Nick was my trainer in 2013 and moved to Texas and we stayed good friends. It was super fun to have him and his girlfriend join us for a couple days.

Le Reve was awesome! My new favorite for sure!! Beware if you sit super close it's a "splash zone". Ha!

Day three began much like days 1 and 2. ;)

Our friends chose the restaurant that night which happened to be our Anniversary (12 years!!) Great company, wonderful food. 

After that we went down to Fremont Street. We stopped at the Cortez for a little Blackjack and had the best table. We all won and left as soon as the tides began to turn. 

We all walked away $100-$200+ up from where we started. Woot!

So lucky to have had 12 years with this guy. Such a catch. Love him deeper than I could have ever imagined and there is no one else I'd rather do life with. Our friends felt these beaded ties were necessary (for a pic that is- put them right back). :)

Until next year....

Goodbye, Kinder

Today, with teary eyes, I picked Declan up from school for the last time as a kindegartener. This year has been full of so many new experiences and challenges. Declan has grown and learned more things than I ever imagined he would. A huge part of his success was his awesome teacher. She went above and beyond advocating for him as he struggled with concentrating his mind and body. We got in to a good groove mid year and he flourished. 

By chance we ended up running in to an old preschool friend, Graham. As we got to know his parents  (amazing people by the way) some business connections were made and Mark interned at their workplace and is now on staff. May I mention it's like "THE" place everyone wants to work?! ;)

A quick selfie with my FIRST grader. He's the best.

Impossible

At times the words and pictures flow capturing our crazy life.

Other times I come to this blank screen night after night and my mind won't fathom how these sweet faces that call me mommy can't be shown. 

How can I share about the day to day without saying my kids names and showing their faces?

Last night I was broken.

Tonight I'm pissed.

Infuriated at a system that would allow children to be out of their home 2 years and still be so far from permanency. How is it that so many people are working hard to protect these boys from any more heartache but all we get is devastating news after each hearing?

I'm starting to get irritated that this is our life. There is a stirring in me. Something that won't rest peacefully in the beauty of our precious family. 

Limbo.

Who will stand up for these kids when those appointed to will not? Our hands are tied, our words not heard. 

I'm starting to get mad at normal families. Families that seemingly have it easy. I'm getting to the point I don't want to really spend much time with my "normal" friends...I mean...how the hell can we relate? No one is armpit deep in the legal disaster we live day to day not knowing what will happen to our kids. 

Please Lord, be near. 

this week

Oh happy day!

I love open adoption. My son's birth parents are such sweet people and I'm grateful for the time we get to spend with them. Recently, Declan's birth mom got married. She met a wonderful guy and they are truly happy- what a gift. We were excited to attend her wedding. The aura in the air was that everyone knew who we were but we didn't really know many people. Declan sure didn't mind. He loves attention and was extra adorable as always. As soon as the bride and groom came out to the foyer after the wedding, Declan went and jumped in her arms. All I could think was his shoes on her dress. ;) She loved it and the cameras started clicking from all directions. So excited for her new life with Luke. 

I've got to cheese with this goober especially when he asks. You think he knows he's cute?!

Spring breakin'

I have to admit the idea of being home all week with my spirited 6 year old sounded, well, exhausting. That it was but it was also full of some great times with Decs and sis.

We met Kristi and her kiddos at Defy Gravity. It's a new indoor trampoline park. I've never seen kids get tired so fast. So much fun!

We did a picnic twice at Holmes Lake. The weather this entire week was straight from heaven: 70s and sunny. 

Lots of sissy snuggles as it was my last week of maternity leave:

I visited L's preschool class to talk about my career as a realtor. It was hilarious. We ended with a selfie, of course:

I still worked a little on maternity leave (shock, I know). Fortunately I have really cool clients and having a couple cute tagalongs wasn't a big deal: