What a difference a day makes

After the emotional day I had yesterday, it was nice to wake up to a Monday and get to work. *I'm not smoking crack* Before I could even get going, I got a call from my RE's (Reproductive Endocrinologist) office. Her nurse informed me of the blood work I needed prior to beginning IVF in 3 weeks. She also told me about all the drugs I needed to order. I asked her if I could just bill that through their office (we are doing a loan for part of the cost and cash for the rest). She then told me that the drugs and all the ultrasounds/blood work you need were NOT included in the price they quoted me of $8,500. Yikes! Those things add up to almost $3,000 in additional fees. I wish I could blog what went through my head, but it includes too many un-ladylike words. :)

I told the nurse that this was all news to me and she acted surprised. I hate that office. They assume you know everything about everything. Whenever I ask any questions they treat me like a dumba**. My hubby can't stand how the nurse and doc talk to me there. When you pay for everything out of pocket, it puts a little extra sting in it. Mrs. Pleasant Pants (the nurse) proceeds to tell me that the doctor is unwilling to let me do just shots and insemination. My PCOS and my resistance to sign a consent to do multi fetal reduction, makes her uncomfortable. WTF? There are tons of women who have this disease. Yes, you can stimulate lots of follies, but that doesn't mean you will every time. Also, it seems a bit unethical to say they won't keep me as a injectables/IUI patient if I don't sign a paper saying I'll reduce if I get too many babies. Sketchy, eh? Here is what I see as our 3 options:

1. Continue with IVF as planned
2. Cancel our IVF plans and instead go back to injectables/IUIs. I really only completed 2 unsuccessful rounds b/c my 3rd round was cancelled due to hyperstimulation. Along with this option, I would add acupuncture and yoga (for my infertility insanity...see yesterday's post). Unfortunately, light exercise is all I can add due to the shots.
3. Quit all the fertility treatment madness and start the adoption process. I would also hit the training/nutrition thing really hard and most likely quit birth control and let nature take it's course. Yes, I know I don't have periods OR ovulatate so this is a stretch, but oh how nice it sounds.

So after a day full of thinking and stressing, we feel more of a direction. *Notice that I keep adding "we" in there. My hubby really has no opinion. He's 100% supportive of whatever decision I make. His only real opinion is that the cost of IVF bites but he doesn't mind if we do it*. I'm still gathering info about yoga & acupuncture, but I'm pretty sure we're going to go with option 2. With option 2, we would incure no new debt b/c we can afford to pay out of pocket (it's under $2000 a round with drugs, ultrasounds, blood works, and insemination).

I feel the door is partially closed for IVF for us. I've been having so much doubt these last few weeks. It was really hard to distinguish whether I'm afraid or whether my intuition is kicking in. I feel like God speaks to me through intuition and my intuition is usually right. Fear? Intuition? Will I ever know? Only if we cough up $11,000 to play out the fear card. At this point, no thanks.

So two more rounds of shots. Please, please, please work!!!! If not, adoption here we come.


Neenie/PawsNY said...

Whatever you choose and whatever works will get you your baby an dit will be th best thing that ever happened to you! IVF is worth the shot- don't let others failures get you down or scare you. Your body is like no one else's. And forget the money. ok ok I know it hurts and its brutal and its debt up the kazoo but the effort is so worth it and priceless. Throw yourself into the shots, the yoga, the dieting- all that makes you FEEL positive and it will fall into place. Sometimes we can't control the way the pieces fall but we can control what kind of picture our puzzle pieces make after they're all put together!
Did you advertise your blog on Stirrup Queens and Sperm Palace Jesters? Its a great network to get your blog out there for support!

Michell said...

I so understand what you mean on the money involved with IVF. I have been trying to get my financing worked out for over a month now for mine with financing the amount for meds in the total even though I paid for them up front. So far it's been a fiasco. Good luck with whatever you decide.

Meghan said...

Coming here from the Lost and Found.

Sorry your clinic is giving you a hard time. You could consider signing the selection reduction form regardless, as there is no way they could hold you to it. You need to consent to medical procedures before they are done, not months in advance. I signed mine even though I doubt I would reduce.

Good luck with everythng regardless!

infertility just sucks said...

I'm with Meghan - if that's the road you want to go down then just sign the consent and say later that you changed your mind. They can't *force* you to reduce! How silly!

I'm guessing this is just a CYA on their part to say "We told you so" in the event of multiples? Boo on that.

My clinic was really high-level at first too - it's super annoying. They're better now, but only after I threw a fit about their lack of communication.y